Mindsets-They’re Everywhere!

So, I have decided to venture out of my zone just a bit.  I am beginning to deliver my messages not just through the comfort of the keyboard, but I am also testing my skills on Periscope.  Yep!  No spell check, no cut and paste, no “do-overs.”  Some pretty scary stuff!

I did a scope today talking a little about mindsets.  I shared how I attended a leadership meeting on last week and the over-arching theme was mindsets.  I share how I attended church this morning and the message dealt with mindsets.  To the average person, this might not mean much, but since I have branded myself as the “ultimate change-agent” I am pretty excited!  I am excited because the thing that I desire to change is, you guessed it, mindsets!  This concept not only has a personal application, but I now see a business application as well.

When you look up the meaning of mindsets, you find things like:  “the ideas and attitudes with which a person approaches a situation; habits of mind formed by previous experience.”  Depending on that experience, mindsets can be positive or negative.  Proverbs 23:7 reads:  “for as he thinks in his heart, so is he in his behavior.” (AMP)

I would dare to say that when things don’t go as planned, the easy thing to do is to place blame.  We blame the situation, other people, and what ever else we can to turn the focus away from ourselves.  Sure, things happen that are out of our control, but what about those things that are in our control.  After all, results are driven by behavior, behavior is driven by feelings, and feelings are driven by thoughts (or mindsets).  How rarely do we take the time out to trace the issue back to our mindset?

Over the next few days, I plan to throw out some real issues on Periscope and hope that you join me there.  You can follow me at @realbeautyatoz.  I will also blog about the same topic–I just need to figure out which will come first–giggle!  In keeping with The ABC’s of Real Beauty, you can expect topics like natural hair, body size, and skin color just to mention a few.

Hang in there with me as I am sure it will be interesting!

 

No Lottery Winner, Now What?

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So out of all the tickets that were purchased, there was no Powerball winner on last night.

Wow!  Over seven-hundred-million dollars, that’s a lot of cash!  I took the opportunity to poll some of my social media friends and asked what they would do if they won.  Almost all of them told me about very noble and heartwarming acts that they would perform if they had the money.  Many stated that getting out of debt would be the 1st thing they would do.  From there, they talked about opening group homes, feeding and clothing the homeless, helping family and friends, helping churches, etc.  Thinking of that kind of money can really get you to dreaming, and dreaming big!

So, for the folks that do not win, what do they do with all those hopes and dreams?  Do they push them into the recesses of their minds only to have them resurface at the next drawing opportunity?  Do they continue to think about those dreams from time to time and think that “someone else” will take up the mantle and perform these humanitarian deeds?  For those that long to get out of debt, if they don’t win the lottery, do they just remain in debt?

I say no!  I am here to challenge you, as well as myself:  we will not give up on those ideas just because we currently don’t have all the money.  One of the things I said I would do with a huge sum of money, is to provide a college education to students that can not afford it.  I got to thinking;  I might not be able to send hundreds of kids to school today, but I can surely start with paying for one class for one student.  I think the key is to make up our minds and just start.

We all want to show up big and do big things but we forget that those who are doing it big now, started small.  We too have to do the same.  We’ve all been given something to do that will impact the life of another.  If you feel you have a song, story, or message, there are lots of “free” resources that you can start with.  Periscope is free and provides the opportunity to reach people around this whole planet!  If you desire to get out of debt, start by cutting up those credit cards, make a budget and stick to it, stop eating out, etc.  If you desire to cloth and feed the homeless, start by handing out blankets, bag lunches, or volunteering and your neighborhood shelter.  If you desire to educate children, start by tutoring a couple of children each week.  It’s simple and the options are endless.  So, will you sit back and wait on boat loads of cash that probably won’t come, or will you begin to start your dream?  Remember to celebrate small victories!

The resources may not show up all at one time, but small provisions are there each and every day.  We just need to look for them.

God promised to give us the desires of our hearts (Psalm 37:4), and I believe that if we will just get started, He will bless the works of our hands. (Deuteronomy 16:15)

Why I Deleted ALL My Emails

_76941134_delete_thinkstock624Yep! As radical as it may sound, I did it! You know the saying “out with the old, in with the new.” Well, I have decided to adopt that philosophy for 2016. As I was sitting here reviewing goals for the new year, I realized that it is time to get laser focused. In order to do that, I saw the need to really consider what all, and who all I have speaking into my life.

Too Many Cooks Spoil The Soup!

Just as with cooking, we have to understand that too many goals, too many ideas, too many activities can begin to limit our effectiveness. Yes, we are busy, but what exactly are we accomplishing? I am in no way saying that I need to stop reaching for my goals, but I am saying that I need to be focused in what I am doing and I need to be intentional.

When I would open my email and see over 1,000 unopened messages, I felt stress. I felt the need to save them and take the time (that I did not have) to try to read through many of them–because after all, there were some really great ideas, wonderful pieces advice, and lots of things I need to consider as I continue to build my brand. However, I finally got the revelation that I can’t do it all and it is not all meant for me to do. Not every great idea or every wonderful piece of advice is for me. I need to decide what works for me at this moment in time, and place my focus there.

So with that, I have just unsubscribed to many newsletters, invites, and so on. Was it painful? YES! Did I feel like I might miss out on something great? YES I DID! But you know what? I can’t place my focus where it needs to be when I am being pulled in so many different directions. Now with that behind me, I will spend the next couple of days listening. Not listening to every voice that surrounds me, but listening to that still, small voice that is within me. I will be paying attention to the leading of that Divine download, instead of the free downloads that flood my inbox. I am sure that some of those computer generated leads will be for me, and if so, will surely come around again; but I will be sure that I am connecting where I am lead to connect.

2016 — The Year of Affirmation!

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I have been missing for a while, but with good cause!

I have been busy working on a new project for the upcoming year.  Several months ago, I was looking for a way to encourage women on a daily basis and the word “affirm” kept rolling around in my head.  I kept asking myself how I might be able to affirm women on a daily basis, but in a way that would keep it short and simple.  That’s when the calendar idea came to me.  Most of us look at some sort of calendar on a daily basis, so I thought this would be the perfect venue to get a message of affirmation across.

But then came the questions.  I have never produced a calendar before, how do I start?  What pictures would I use?  What messages would I give?  Then entered doubt with fear not too far behind.  Is that really a good idea?  Who would purchase it?  Would people be encouraged by it?  But no matter what questions surfaced and how often, I was determined to make it happen!  Once I set my mind to it, the answers began to appear.  I decided that I would not make this just “my” project, but I figured it would be more meaningful if I got a group of women together to tell their stories.  I reached out to a photographer who had recently done some promotional photos for me.  He agreed to help me and introduced me to a wonderful makeup artist that he works closely with.

Ok, so I have a concept, a photographer, and a makeup artist.  Now all I need are women, women with stories to be told.  Not sure where to find them, I stepped out on faith and put out a call on Facebook.  Yep, Facebook!  Within a couple of hours, the slots were filled.  Who would have thought?  Authors, coaches, speakers, entrepreneurs, a vocalist, and a breast cancer survivor; I would not have been able to put together a more dynamic group if I had tried to hand-pick them myself.  It was such a divine orchestration that one of the participants, a domestic violence survivor and advocate, contacted me all the way from California asking how she might participate.  The photo shoots were taking place in Birmingham, AL and I was at a loss.  She told me to hold her slot for a few weeks while she worked out a plan.  During that period of time, her husband was relocated to upstate NY and during their move across the country, she stopped overnight in Birmingham, AL to participate.  When it was all said and done, I had the fortunate pleasure to host the grand launch on Saturday, December 5, 2015!

I invite you order your copy and see what these women have to say!  Be affirmed throughout 2016 but even more than that, learn from my process– understanding that we don’t need to see the whole process when it comes to our goals and dreams, we just need to put the negative thinking behind us and simply begin!

Visit www.realbeautyatoz.com to order.

Believe!

Dear Daughter,

I want to take this opportunity to encourage and inspire you to just be You. I know it may seem like you’re on this journey all by yourself and that the only person you can count on is yourself. With that in mind, I want you to know that you can believe in yourself even if you think no one else does.
What this will do for you is prepare you to fully trust that You will know when you need to allow others into your life and heart. So that they may be able to help you, offer you guidance and even show you some love. Now is your time to really get to know the real You.
So be encouraged and know that the You who is reading this letter is smart, beautiful and courageous now: no matter what it looks like. The you now will be even greater later because you are taking the time now to grow her up spiritually and emotionally. I believe that great things are in store for you and as you navigate through life, I pray that you will Enjoy the Journey!
Signed,

Someone who believes in You

Submitted by: Tracy Colvin
You can read Tracy’s blog at: M924life.blogspot.com
Or follow her on Twitter: @M924life

Skinny Jeans! How Tight Is Too Tight?

They are the fashion rage–skinny jeans!  We see them everywhere.  However, I just ran across this article that I thought was worth sharing.  It was printed by Eurek Alert, the global source for Science News.  I don’t know about you, but not being able to walk for four days is pretty serious stuff!  What are your thoughts?

Squatting in ‘skinny’ jeans can damage nerve and muscle fibers in legs and feet | EurekAlert! Science News//

Public Release: 22-Jun-2015 Squatting in ‘skinny’ jeans can damage nerve and muscle fibers in legs and feet

Tight jeans seem to worsen compression exerted by squatting

Squatting in ‘skinny’ jeans for a protracted period of time can damage muscle and nerve fibres in the legs, making it difficult to walk, reveals a case study published online in the Journal of Neurology Neurosurgery & Psychiatry.

Doctors describe a case of a 35 year old woman who arrived at hospital with severe weakness in both her ankles. The previous day she had been helping a relative move house, and had spent many hours squatting while emptying cupboards.

She had been wearing tight ‘skinny’ jeans and recalled that these had felt increasingly tight and uncomfortable as the day wore on.

Later that evening, she experienced numbness in her feet and found it difficult to walk, which caused her to trip and fall. Unable to get up, she spent several hours lying on the ground before she was found.

Her calves were so swollen that her jeans had to be cut off her. She couldn’t move her ankles or toes properly and had lost feeling in her lower legs and feet.

Investigations revealed that she had damaged muscle and nerve fibres in her lower legs as a result of prolonged compression while squatting, which her tight jeans had made worse, the doctors suggest.

The jeans had prompted the development of compartment syndrome–reduced blood supply to the leg muscles, causing swelling of the muscles and compression of the adjacent nerves.

She was put on an intravenous drip and after 4 days she could walk unaided again, and was discharged from hospital.

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9 Things Middle-Aged Women Should Stop Doing (Part 3 of 3)

This is the final post for this series.  There were a few more suggestions in the article, but I only picked the 9 that I felt would make the most impact.  I have enjoyed receiving your comments and continue to welcome your feedback!  So, let’s dive into the final three.

7.  Not Getting Enough Sleep. “Sleep is vitally important and big bags under your eyes won’t do anything for your looks. Getting 7-8 solid hours of sleep will keep you healthy and feeling energized.”  

Now I can hear you saying:  “who has time to get 7 to 8 hours of sleep.”  Yes, we all lead busy lives, but remember, if we don’t take care of ourselves, we won’t be able to take care of anyone else.  Rest, just like any other activity, can be scheduled.  We just have to determine what is more important.

8.  Eating Processed Foods “Listen to some of these ingredients: pink slime, ammonia, castoreum, silicon dioxide…do these sound healthy and delicious? Not to mention the added sugar, salt and colorants that can be devastating to our metabolism and overall health. Sticking to more natural foods is good advice for us all.”

Now this is one that I have made a sincere effort to embrace.  Just taking the time to read labels has really opened my eyes.  I truly believe that some of the medical issues that we are having as a society is directly related to what we are eating.  Our bodies don’t know how to process some of the foreign material that we are imposing on our systems.  I am making an effort to reduce sodas and drink more water; eat more fresh fruit instead of packaged snacks; cooking in rather that eating out.  It takes discipline, but I think I am worth the effort.

9.  Refusing to Change “It’s important to acknowledge that the hair, clothing and activities you used to indulge in may not be the most appropriate for you now. The days of binge drinking and miniskirts should be over. That’s certainly not to say you can enjoy your life and be attractive, but we can’t all be Madonna. Aging gracefully will make you happier in the long run.”

Yep!  I’ve definitely come to the realization that I am not 20 anymore.  But I’m thankful that I am alive, healthy, and much wiser!  Instead of dreading the aging process, embrace it!  Aging does not mean that we have to walk around like the world is ending,  but I think the sooner that we accept the process, the happier we will be.  I have seen some beautiful women who have passed the 40 and 50 mark–they are sharp dressers and living life to the fullest.

Personally, I plan to be as sharp as Tina Turner when I grow up!  What about you?

9 Things Middle-Aged Women Should Stop Doing (Part 2 of 3)

This post continues the series and if you missed the first three items, you can catch them here. To continue…

4. Stop Tanning. “Tanning is like smoking, you know you shouldn’t do it but sometimes it becomes an addiction. Talk about premature aging, the damage caused by UV radiation can lead to wrinkles, brown spots, lax skin as well as skin cancer. Those who use indoor tanning beds are 74% more likely to melanoma than those who do not. Grab some bronzing lotion instead and save yourself a world of trouble.”  

Since I am African-American, the whole business of tanning is not something that’s top of mind for me.  I think that fun activities spent in the sun (as long as we are protecting our skin) is beneficial.  With all the discussions around tanning beds, I can’t really say if I would recommend it to anyone or not.  I would think that just like anything else, if done in moderation it may be ok?  However, natural and healthy seems to be the way to go!

5. Stop Forgetting to Exercise. While it’s true that you’ll probably never get your 20-year-old butt back, you can still be active and healthy. Deciding to give up on exercise altogether is one of the worst things you can do for your body. Join a walking group, hire a trainer or even just do some simple workouts at home a few times a week. You’ll feel better and most likely look better too.”

Ouch!  Now this one is for me.  Actually I am not forgetting to exercise, I am just not doing it. (honesty is supposed to be freeing)  I know for a fact that when I do exercise, I rest better and my clothes fit better.  I have a membership to a gym, so I have no excuse.  I just need to put it in my schedule and do it.

6. Wearing Too Much Makeup.When you’re pushing 50, heavy foundation, bright eye shadow and blood-red lipstick starts to work against you. The “less is more” approach is what you should strive for when you’re middle aged. It might actually make you look younger!”

Hmmm, I really want to hear what you have to say about this one!  I do tend to agree.  I have seen some women who look like they have on a mask.  Make up should be used to enhance and when it is used to cover, I think that’s when the tendency comes to over-apply.  Personally, since I have started wearing glasses, I have found that the use of a magnifying mirror works wonders.  It also helps to have honest friends!

9 Things Middle-Aged Women Should Stop Doing (Part 1 of 3)

Now that’s a catchy title, and since I am approaching middle age, it grabbed my attention for sure!  This is a re-post of an article I found on Answers.com.  I was doing a bit of surfing and really can’t remember how I landed there; I agree with most of what’s said, but I also got a few chuckles!  Since putting all nine items in one post would make it really long, I am splitting it into three parts.  I will be quoting the article and adding my commentary after each item.  I would love to hear what you think about some of the topics!

So, here we go:

1.  Stop Wearing Mom Jeans. “Once a woman hits the age of 45, it doesn’t mean she has to start wearing unflattering, high-waisted jeans. Ladies, have a little pride! Saturday Night Live even created a skit depicting women wearing “mom jeans” with the tagline: “For this Mother’s Day, don’t give Mom that bottle of perfume. Give her something that says, ‘I’m not a woman anymore…I’m a mom!”

I think this is hilarious, but oh so true!  However, I really don’t think I’ve seen anyone in the “high-rise” version of these jeans lately—maybe they are hidden by their tops?  Jeans are very fashionable and can be very flattering if fitted correctly.

2. Stop Smoking.  The negative health effects have been proven many times over, but if that’s not enough of a reason, how about vanity? Studies are now showing that smoking can age you prematurely. Researchers at the Department of Plastic Surgery at Case Western Reserve University, compared head shots of 79 sets of twins between the ages of 18 and 78 and the judges said the smoking twin appeared older over 57% of the time.”

I totally agree with this one, no commentary necessary.  I tried smoking when I was younger and I am so thankful that it was a habit that did not take!  I see the affects up close and personal with relatives, it is not a blessing.

 3.  Stop Comparing Yourself to Younger Women. Once you accept that you’ll never be 20 again (and you’ll never look 20 again) you’ll be much, much happier. Constantly comparing yourself to women half your age is unhealthy and impractical. Everyone ages and that’s perfectly fine. You are still beautiful!”

Totally agree!  Maybe I’m missing something, but why would I want to be 50 and look 20 anyway? I really don’t think it’s possible unless someone creates a full-body lift.  It’s just something about the neck and hands that will always tell the truth.

Stay tuned for the next three…